Chicago Public Library welcomes a guest blog post from Dr. Jenny Radesky, a Developmental Behavioral Pediatrician. Her research interests include use of mobile technology by parents and young children and how this relates to child self-regulation and parent-child interaction. She also works with the American Academy of Pediatrics Center of Excellence on Social Media and Youth Mental Health and helped create CPL's Screen Time Guide for Families.
One thing I’ve learned in my 15 years of researching technology and families is that tech can be a connector or disconnector.
It can connect you to news, ideas, laughs and other people going through similar life events. But it can also disconnect you from your immediate surroundings or encourage avoidance of the stressful parts of interacting with other people. When we get lost in a feed of other people’s content, it can even disconnect us from ourselves.
Across several studies, I’ve found that parents’ smartphone use can interrupt parent-child play and talking, and lead to worse child behavior over time. Also, parents’ technology habits set the tone for their children by modeling how often, when and why screens are used.
Most parents I’ve talked to want to cut down on their unnecessary and distracting phone use, especially around their kids. Parenting is exhausting. Needing to relax or “not think for a minute” is a main reason why parents grab their phones at the end of the day. But with social media and other apps designed to capture our attention and not let it go, we can wind up spending hours online without meaning to. Scrolling on a feed can unintentionally add to your stress–tech companies know what attracts your attention and content never stops.
I usually advise parents to get physical distance from their phone when they want to spend time with their kids, so it’s not a distraction. Parents can also, customize notification settings, put on phone 'focus mode' and uninstall time-wasting apps. As a replacement, you can download apps that support your hobbies or interests like Libby or Hoopla where you can read an eBook or listen to an audiobook instead of doomscrolling.
You can also create a lock screen that reminds you to do your favorite offline escape: make a cup of tea, walk outside, call a friend or hang out with your pet.
My favorite way to de-stress at the end of a day is to watch something with my teenage sons. We’ve been through The Pitt, Rooster, Shrinking, Ted Lasso and other long-form shows that tell compelling or hilarious stories. Co-viewing is a great way to use tech for connection rather than disconnection, and choosing connection over perfection.
Want to connect with a book? Try one of these compelling books that can be a stress reliever or a brain break when you need it. Or try my book, Connecting: Raising Kids in a Digital World for more tips for kids and adults.
To learn more about how to check out eBooks, look here or visit your neighborhood library.
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