Guest Blog: Kerry Ryan Lynch on Choose Kind

As part of Choose Kind Chicago, we’re featuring a guest blog by Kerry Ryan Lynch, mother of 3-year-old Mary Cate Lynch. Mary Cate, of Beverly, was born with a rare condition called Apert syndrome; she and her mother make presentations at schools throughout the Chicago area emphasizing author R.J. Palacio’s message to Choose Kind. Chicago Public Library joins Choose Kind Chicago in October by hosting events at CPL locations, recommending books and featuring R.J. Palacio as our Author of the Month.

Nearly four years ago, my husband and I sat in a neonatal intensive-care unit just hours after the birth of our first child, Mary Cate. It was there that we learned of her diagnosis, Apert syndrome, an extremely rare craniofacial syndrome. As we sat there shocked, sobbing and fearful, we listened to a pediatric geneticist tell us what her life could look like. She could be blind, deaf, may struggle to walk or speak, she could have severe developmental and cognitive delays. What struck us the most was the expected lack of social and emotional acceptance Mary Cate would face due to her physical differences.

We knew that day that we would do everything in our power to make her life the best possible. We wanted to educate those around us on her syndrome, as we knew, like us, many had never heard of Apert syndrome. We knew that with knowledge, fears would be eased, and acceptance would be possible. Little did we know that just three months after Mary Cate's birth, a book called Wonder would be published, and what a difference it would make in empowering our crusade of educating the world about children with physical differences and even more importantly about how to be kind.

While our family was busy trying to navigate our “new normal,” R.J. Palacio was busy preparing to publish a book that would trail blaze a movement and change the lives of millions of people around the world, including our own. Wonder has impacted thousands of families with and without personal connections to and stories about craniofacial syndromes.

It took me a few months to gather the courage to finally read Wonder. I knew it would mirror so much of our lives and play out the scenarios we fear in Mary Cate’s future. But, once I picked up Wonder, I couldn't put it down. I was glued…I cried, I laughed, I cried more, my heart hurt, my heart burst with pride, and most of all I was enamored. I was enamored that a book could so realistically and eloquently teach such important and life-changing lessons about kindness, acceptance and differences to children and adults all at the same time.

I want to take this time and send our most heartfelt thank you to R.J. Palacio. Her work has given a platform to our mission, given a peek into the life of those affected by craniofacial conditions, and most importantly has encouraged and promoted conversations about differences, empathy and how incredibly important it is to remember that above all else, kindness will always be the right choice and kindness will always prevail. Kindness seems like such a basic concept, but it is something we all can use reminders about in our everyday life. Our hope is that Wonder and the message to always Choose Kind continues full steam ahead, being integrated in schools, libraries and households all over the world, and these lessons are encouraged and reinforced in all aspects of life.